20th post... Halloween, daylight savings time, random thought about habits

As I write in this blog I will mark the 20th post I have made since I started this blog that started what seems like not too long ago. Of course I must also make a statement about two interesting yet different occasions currently going on Daylight Savings time and Halloween,sometimes referred as All Hallows Eve and Sammain. Daylight Savings is an invention of Stanfort Flemming a Canadian who thought it would be a larf to get many countries in the world to just change their clocks twice a year. Halloween as we all know is a day when to quote from the movie Mean Girls "when girls dress up as sluts for fun" and when everybody else dresses up as anything else from a Television Set, to a flasher to a simple pedestrian, anything goes (I myself dressed up as an Arab). And so the legend of halloween is also when the barier between the living and dead is paper thin, so every now and then on halloween that barier is broken and the living party with zombies and have wild orgies and so forth. Moving on, what is it about a bad habit? I mean what is that psychological aspect of it that commands control of us? And yet we are aware of this habit and its implications yet we decide to continue despite our internal objections and why? why saccrifice our own self control for the purpose of derriving pleasure from somethign if only for a fleeting moment? Well I am not going to take it anymore dangit, one's got to have control over their own affairs. Its only right.

Some random funny stuff:

So one more thing, I had this dream last night, and since I am too lazy to re-type it all, I decided to use a convo I had on MSN instead so here it goes:

sam says:
I had an odball dream last night
Ben's a Hell of a Drug: NUKE SARNIA says:
feel free to make comments
Ben's a Hell of a Drug: NUKE SARNIA says:
oh yeah?
sam says:
something about a hot girl, and me rolling down a hill with the united sates supreme court judges
sam says:
and then there was a porn star trying to seduce me
Ben's a Hell of a Drug: NUKE SARNIA says:
really? sounds good
Ben's a Hell of a Drug: NUKE SARNIA says:
blogging is a good way to get things off your chest
sam says:
yeah but I woke up before she told me if the was single or not, and I all of a sudden was playing solitaire when me and said porn star started to do anything
Ben's a Hell of a Drug: NUKE SARNIA says:
too bad

It is incredible the kind of strength you can have in yourself that you aren't aware of. I don't mean to sound self pitifull or anything or make this blog about that sort of stuff, but Last night I realized the glib conclusion that no matter what I have done so far in life I have always ended up alone. Don't get me wrong I still have my support system, my family for one who have supported me in more ways than one but I don't feel like I have too many friends that I can personally be around. Instant messaging has provided somewhat of a conduit to talk to people (as pathetic as that sounds) but its not reality. Despite it all there are a few things that never change, for one I always every night make a prayer before I go to sleep. Its the one thing I have to do before I go to bed. Another thing is that despite me being secretley miserable deep down, I am still optimistic about things and there's always something thats edging me on and I can't help but think that has something to do with my faith. I know I am not the most pious person, but its comforting to know that there is a higher power that guides us.

What Am I F***n doing in life? honestly I put myself down too much. I never get anything done according to plan. Like this weekend I planned on getting started on my looming Politics assignment, and my Annontated Bibliography for History and what happens so far bubkus. I just squandered my time on meaningless things like sitting on the computer watching Kill Bill , or The Daily Show, or other acts that I prefer not to mention here because I don't want to get into that whole thing. I just don't seem to be focused lately or for that matter ever at all I don't know what it is, I always feel like I am missing something. To try to get an aswer for a question you don't know, if that makes any sense. Although I did manage to scrounge a halloween costume, or rather ressurect a halloween costume I had in my closet all these years. The fact that my mom was cool enough to make the Galabeia for me in one night really makes you greatfull for having such a loving family. Of course thats not to say I won't have moments where I am completely focused which is a rare occasion. I just wish that would happen more often, because I would like to get more things done sooner and end this horrible habbit of procrastination. My last rant for now is my sleeping habbits, lately I just seem to be quite the night owl which is great if my name was Ed or Bob and I was working as a night watchman at the Ivory tower or something but the reality is I am a 2nd year University student with many classes that happen during the morning hours so its important that I have a regular sleep pattern that conforms to the norms of society. Despite this all my every attempt to sleep early is twarted by my innability to just push myself to go to sleep. With that note I shall end my comment for the day Until Next time. Live Long And Prosperous

I just finished watching the 3rd and final presidential debate a few hours ago between Bush and Kerry, and I have to say I am not overly impressed by the way both have ran. The debate format for one was heavily regulated and the answers both candidates both provided was really more extended campaigning. Is that really how a democracy is supposed to work? where's the connection to people? Of course one can point to the second debate where "real" voters who were somehow determined that they were undecided voters asked the candidates questions. But let us not forget that these people were handpicked in advance. Of course the candidates won't know the questions, but they both reherse for hours prior to the debates. So where are the real questions and the real answers? Is it too much to ask for these Candidates to loosen up, aren't they supposed to hold a true connection to people?

This is just a post in honor of Christopher Reeves, known by many as Superman in the 1970's hit movies. who died recently after undergoing a medical operation. For 9 years he suffered from spinal cord injuries and despite it all created a foundation in his name for research into spinal cord injuries. Reeves was always being interviewed saying he would one day walk again, and indeed he will be in heaven that is. Long Live Superman